On Decision Making

Decisions and “fallowing my gut” have always come rather easy to me. I am an extremely emotional person and, as an INFP, can easily see what my ideal life and world hold. I am also hyper aware of my flaws and how they effect others.


Add to that the fact that I somewhat set spontaneity on a pedestal in High School and you just get an emotional whirlwind of a person who doesn’t want anyone else attached to them. Not very glamorous, you guys.


When I was 19 the Lord somehow healed me enough that I was able to marry the love of my life without pulling a runaway bride on his adorable little butt. So I guess you can say I’ve grown.


But as a result I never went to University, instead opting to spend 10 months in cosmetology school hell learning a skill I hoped would fill my creative, emotional void.


Spoiler alert: It didn’t.


The year is now 2016, I am 20 years old and I, a natural academic, have never been to college. I always said I would go someday for a degree in literature, but my one requirement was to go somewhere I really wanted to go. The problem is that that place is: A) In an inconvenient location that my husband is NOT going to move to and B) Incredibly expensive.


Sometimes “someday” never comes, and sometimes in comes faster than you ever think it would. And my “someday” has already snuck up behind me, tapped me on the shoulder, and is now piggy backing until I kick it off.


This Monday I will drive into Midtown Atlanta, drink coffee, and talk about my "someday" with someone who knows more than me, but for now I am in Jacksonville while my husband is working. And sometimes time alone to wander art galleries and drink double dirty chai is all you need to calm the soul. 


What do you do when there are so many different parts of you and so many different people to please?